Obesity: Understanding, Causes, and When to Seek Help

Hello, my dears! It’s Alla Sem here. When I weighed 110 kg, I didn’t just feel heavy in my body—I felt heavy in my heart. The shame, the judgment, the silent stares… I know what it’s like to live with obesity. But I also know what it’s like to overcome it. Today, I want to talk openly about what obesity really is, what causes it, and most importantly—when and how to seek help.

What Is Obesity?

The excess portion of total body fat is called obesity. If your weight is more than 20% of your normal weight, then you are considered obese. BMI (Body Mass Index) is the measure most doctors use. If your BMI is between 25 and 29.9, you are overweight. If it’s 30 or above, you are in the obesity range. There is also morbid obesity—when a person weighs more than 50–100% of their normal weight and their BMI exceeds 40. I was there. I know how scary that number can feel.

What Causes Obesity?

At its simplest level, obesity happens when you consume more calories than you burn. But it’s never really that simple, is it? Many people become obese due to a combination of factors—too much eating, too little moving, and so much more.

Age and Metabolism: Your body metabolism can slow down as you age, and you won’t need as many calories. That’s why weight can creep up even when you haven’t changed your eating habits.

Gender: Women can struggle more with weight than men. Men typically have a higher metabolic rate and need more calories. Women have a lower metabolic rate and often gain weight after menopause. I’ve seen this in myself and in so many women who write to me.

Genetics: Your genes play a role too. If your biological mother is thin, you might have a natural advantage. If not, you might have to work harder—but please know, genetics are not destiny. I proved that to myself.

Environment and Lifestyle: Your surroundings matter. If you live in an environment where healthy food isn’t accessible or where sitting is the norm, it’s harder to stay active. Active people need more calories to maintain their weight. Physical activity increases metabolism and helps you burn more calories. If you don’t move, weight can pile on.

Emotional and Psychological Factors: This one is close to my heart. People tend to eat in response to negative emotions like anger, sadness, and boredom. Binge eating—when you eat large amounts of food and can’t control your appetite—is real. I used to eat my feelings, and I know many of you do too.

Medical Conditions and Medications: Sometimes obesity is linked to hormonal problems like hypothyroidism, depression, or brain conditions that lead to overeating. Certain antidepressants and steroids can also cause weight gain. If you suspect this, please don’t blame yourself—talk to your doctor.

The Emotional Aspects of Obesity

Emotional suffering is one of the most painful aspects of obesity. Our society often equates thinness with worth, and obesity with laziness or gluttony. I’ve been stereotyped that way, and it hurts. Obese people face discrimination and prejudice at work, at school, and in social situations. The feelings of shame, rejection, and depression can be overwhelming. If you’re feeling this right now, please hear me: you are worthy, you are beautiful, and you deserve help and healing.

When to Seek Help for Obesity

If you’re experiencing emotional distress related to your weight, please reach out to your doctor or a trusted professional. You deserve support. Here are some specific signs that it’s time to seek help:

• Your BMI is 30 or greater. This puts you in the obesity range and can increase your risk for health problems. Talk to your doctor about safe weight loss options—including medications like Semaglutide, which helped me lose 30 kg.
• You have an “apple shape” or “spare tire” around your middle. Fat stored in the abdomen is linked to higher health risks. For women, a waist measurement below 35 inches is recommended; for men, below 40 inches. If your waistline is larger, it’s worth discussing with your doctor.
• You’ve tried everything and nothing works. I tried for years before finding what worked for me. You don’t have to do this alone.

Remember, my dears: obesity is a medical condition, not a moral failing. I walked this path from 110 kg to 80 kg, and I’m here to tell you—change is possible. Start by understanding your body, seek the right help, and take that first step. You are not alone.

With love and belief in you,
Alla Sem